We’re coming up on the halfway marker for this amazing year of the Sheep. How are those New Year’s Resolutions going? Have you accomplished everything that you set out for on January first? Have you been significant? Successful? Have you Shown Up and got everything that you wanted? WHY NOT?????? I’m going to list 23 Commandments to follow for the remainder of the year to help get you back on track for awesomeness in 2015. Don’t give up now, the fun has only begun.
Before I get into this supercalifragilisticexpialidocious list (why don’t people use that word more?) let’s address the difference between significance, and success.
Significance VS Success
Students, trainers, and clients constantly tell me that they want to be more successful by making more money. Is that truly success? It totally depends on the individual. If money drives you (which unfortunately it does for the majority of us), then making more of it would technically make you more successful; KUDOS. I’m a people person and prefer helping others. I feel that the more people that you help, the more significant you’ll become. Franklin’s and Jackson’s will follow if your mindset is right. I’m going to challenge you for the remainder of 2015 to focus on others and not yourself. Let’s strive for greater significance, success will follow.
23 Commandments for remainder of 2015…The simple stuff; LET’S GOOOOOOOOO!!!
1. Drink half your body weight in ounces of water. I know you’ve heard it more times than Lil Troy’s 1998 “I wanna be a balla, SHOT CALLA,” but it’s probably the most important commandment. FYI, for the longest time I thought it was “SHOCK COLLAR” and wanted to know why hell would someone want to shock people? Weird. If you want more energy, sexier skin and hair, maximize fat loss, feel better, and decrease headaches; DO IT.
2. Eat more fruits and vegetables. In the mornings and before workouts, focus on fruits that have more fiber (pears, blackberries, apples). After you lift weights, consume faster absorbing fruits i.e. pineapple, bananas, melons, and dates. Try a new vegetable and stick with it daily i.e. kale, cauliflower, Brussels or the hybrid BrusselKale – NOT JOKING!
3. WIN THE WEEK, aka lift weights 4 days a week. Anything less, and the likelihood of seeing results are as good as Texas winning the National Championship… maybe the year? Ladies, would you rather have developed / perky glutes aka DAT A%@, or soft, flat and cheesy cheeks? Ya’all want ’em, but ain’t willing to do the work. LIFT HEAVY and watch what happens. REMEMBER, it’ll take time. Look at this ladies amazing transformation after 1 solid year of lifting heavy…
4. Sleep 7 – 10 hours. It’s called beauty sleep for a reason: HGH release (miracle fountain of youth hormone), cellular restoration, decrease insulin resistance, and natural energy.
5. Walk more. If you like cardio, sobeit. In my opinion, running & cycling wreaks havoc on the body- especially if you’re one of the 69% of American’s who’re overweight. Start walking more. Walk for 30 minutes after workouts, or park 1 mile away from work, walk during lunch, and or after dinner. Walking is a necessity
6. Eat ANIMAL Protein. No hippie-dippy stuff. If you want weak bones, teeth, nails, hair, wussy numbers in the weight room, and lower testosterone levels, then go vegetarian- by all means. Animal protein is the backbone for strength and fat loss. Aim for your weight in grams of protein if you’re a male (200lb dude, eat 200g a day), if you’re a women, multiple your weight by .8 (150lb girl, eat 120g).
7. Foam roll/soft tissue manipulation. Your muscles are like teeth, they need maintenance. Stretching is fine and dandy, but if you want to feel, perform, and move better, foam rolling is your new best friend. Foam rolling aka soft tissue manipulation, brings blood to areas that lack oxygen (hypoxia)- this allows for better movement. Does your knee hurt? Foam roll six inches above the knee, the side of your thigh (vastus lateralis), and inner thigh (adductors). Hold each “cuss word spot” for at least 30 seconds. You’ll understand why I ’em them that.
More challenging Commandments for 2015…
8. Smile more. I challenge you to try this… on your way to work, see how many people you can smile at. You may be surprised at how grumpy people are, but I guarantee you’ll get at least one kind human to reciprocate. Better yet, you’ll make someone’s day.
9. Read more. Supposedly, the more you read, the better you can spell? Horse S*&$!!!!! I read 2-4 books a month and can’t spell worth a damn! Moreover, knowledge is power. I challenge my students to read a fitness, business, and personal book once a month. Keep a book on you at all times. You’ll be amazed how many times you’ll have 5-10 minutes of free time. It’s way better to be immersed in a good book, than stocking your EX on Facebook. Seriously, who cares what they’re doing? Better your mind and body, so when that day comes….
10. Start a morning exercise routine. “Merica” is fat; it’s no secret. We spend hours sitting in chairs, watching tv, bitching about mundane things, and not exercising. It’s safe to assume that the average person has weak glutes, a weak core, and bad posture. Let’s try implementing the following routine daily: 10 Body Weight squats A@# TO THE GRASS (I don’t care about the butt wink- your spine isn’t under load, you’ll live), 10 Push-ups, 30 seconds standing on 1 leg, 10 single leg bridges, vacuum holds (3-5 reps holding 10 seconds each rep). This routine will take less than 5 minutes. When you’re done, slam 24 ounces of water college style. Look what you just did; killed two birds with one stone.
11. See your goals DAILY. Get a calendar and set daily, weekly, and monthly goals. I have a calendar with three months of stuff that I WILL accomplish, as well as a chalk board in my kitchen with awesomized motivational quotes: “I DON’T LOSE, I EITHER WIN, OR LEARN”, “SHAKE AND BAKE,” & my future wife, “LACEY CHABERT.”
12. Limit exposure to time blockers i.e. Instagram, Facebook, Pinterest. Do I really need to explicate? Who gives a flying F&*$ that your friend Billy Bob is in the Caribbean with his GF having a beer on the beach? Hey Billy, I don’t want to see a picture of your ugly A$% feet with the ocean in the background; C’MON! I use FB and IG purely to stock people and business purposes. What I meant to say was, I use FB / IG for business purposes only, I swear.
13. Give more. Not as in fellatio or cunnilingus (that’s never a bad thing though), I’m talking about giving back to humanity. Adopt a dog or cat. Volunteer at the local soup kitchen, shelter, or food drive. What about helping a friend with no strings attached? Be a giver, not a taker.
14. Add some supplements into your life. Take these supplements (as long as your Doctor says its ok): Whey Protein, ZMA, Multi vitamin, BCAA, creatine, and fish oil.
Want to maximize fat loss? For breakfast have 30g of Whey Protein. People who consume greater amounts of protein in the morning are more likely to lose fat. Protein takes longer to digest, and it keeps you full longer. You’ll be less likely to eat that doughnut at work next time someone brings in a dozen…
Zinc & Magnesium or ZMA. These are two minerals that the average person is extremely deficient in. Zinc is important for Testosterone production = fat loss and an increase in libido- FOR BOTH SEXES. Magnesium naturally calms neurotransmitters (a wondering mind before bed) and muscles. Together, these will help you sleep so tomorrow you’ll be recharged and ready to tackle life with your best foot forward.
Multi-Vitamin. Unless you’re consuming 5-10 fruits and vegetables a day, you’re probably deficient in a few important vitamins and/or minerals. Take the recommended dosage and you’ll be positioning the yourself to maximize energy production and fatloss.
BCAA (Leucine, Isoleucine, and Valine). These essential amino acids are important for muscle growth and the prevention of muscle breakdown. Look for a ratio of 3:1:1 in favor of leucine. Leucine is anti-catabolic which means you’ll prevent using your muscle as fuel. At the end of the day, we’re all trying to build more muscle aka increase our metabolism.
Creatine. This magical compound helps the body do more work. If you can squat 200lbs for 8 reps, creatine will allow you to perform 12. The more work you can do, the better results will be achieved. Depending on your size, aim for 5-10g a day.
Fish Oil. Omega 3’s are extremely important to combat inflammation, cellular repair, and oxidation. Taking 3-5g a day will help your vision, heart, brain, and hair.
Not your average Commandments:
15. Don’t be afraid of drinking! Yes, you read that right. Did Spartacus drink wine? Was Spartacus a badass? Was Spartacus ripped? Simple logic, A + B + C= awesome. Wait a second, that’s not logic; who gives a S&*#! Be human and have fun. Don’t be a dud and give up all the fun things in life. Stay away from the drinks with a lot of sugar i.e. margaritas, mojitos, or any soda. Man up and take your drinks straight i.e. martini, tequila, or my favorite, whiskey neat! Then again, not many men in LA! Enter the phase of the “manly” MAN BUN!
16. Be positive. You’re the sum of the people you hang around with. To be optimistic, you need to surround yourself with like minded individuals. Weak people face life’s obstacles with an excuse. Badass people (like us) face life’s obstacles with an axe. HIIYAAAA!
17. Have More Sex! I just read a poll about people on their death beds. Biggest regrets…. SPENDING MORE TIME NAKED! Take home message from our elders…HUMP HUMP HUMP!!!
18. Get on Tinder, Plenty of Fish, Ok Cupid, Fitness Singles, J Date, Grinder- whatever floats your boat. Dating sites are more socially accepted today, so there’s nothing to be ashamed of. We’ve all seen that buddy who meets a new fling. He’s super giddy, always smiling, and positive. That feeling aka honeymoon phase is truly magical! Not to mention you’re gonna be knocking boots a lot more (see #17.) Here’s my love advice: don’t jump into the love pond head first. Been there, and done that. You’ll end up neglecting friends and ruining the relationship. Give it time and keep your options open. Enjoy the company, but don’t be a push-over! Remember, this is the year to be a bada#& and accomplish significance. Having that rock at your side will only allow you to do more. CAUTION…Be smart and wrap your tools- hivolaitis isn’t cool.
19. Dress to impress. Ladies what do you think of a guy who’s in sweat pants, has a beer belly, stains on his shirt, smells like fish, and unkept? Guys, what do you think about a girl who shows up to a date in sweats and a sweatshirt? What am I working with here? Does she have big boobs? A nice RUMP? I don’t know! Superficial Chris? Shut up :-). We want to put our best foot forward. The better dressed you are, the more confident you’ll feel. Look your best as many hours out of the day as possible. Then when you get home, get naked and enjoy it.
20. Rid yourself of jealousy. I don’t understand it, but a lot of you have it. Have confidence in yourself. Jealousy is for the weak minded- ain’t nobody got time for that!
21. NO MORE CARDIO. If you’re going to run a 5k, 10k, half marathon or a marathon- have at it! Otherwise, lift weights and do higher intense cardio. Think of cardio as doing 50-70% of your bodies maximal work output. What happened in college when you got a 60%? You failed. Learn to get more bang for your buck aka higher intense, short spurt, sprints. Follow us on Instagram and watch what we’ve been doing. 12, 25 yard sprints aka 300yrd shuttle run. Do 1-2 of these per day with a few minutes of rest between. You’ll be blasting fat around your mid-section and thighs in no time. No more steady state aka low intense cardio… unless you like it, want to burn muscle, and be inferior- your call.
22. Do things that scare you. If you’re about to do something and that weak inner voice peaks its head, DO IT! Talk to strangers in line. Talk to that girl or boy. Break out of your comfort zone. No one remembers second place. Have NO REGRETS and get what you want!
23. SHOW UP AND SHUT UP. Enough said.
These 23 commandments will shape the rest of your year. You’ll be smarter, more confident, help more people, own your mind, have more sex, move better and stress less. HOLY CRAPOLA, I’ve just secretly fixed your S.P.I.N.E. – Read the Vulgar Truth Diet.